![]() ![]() Eventually we exchanged numbers and he started texting incessantly. I was messaging with a guy recently and he was kind of aggressive-messaging frequently and whatnot. One friend recently relayed her own online-dating saga to me: To this, add the anonymity of online communication and the ambiguity that results when two strangers try to kindle a romantic connection through a medium that can't convey sarcasm, body language, or even a smile. You were just interested a second ago, and now you're saying, ‘you have a fat ugly nose.’” “They're just trying to strike at whatever our insecurities are. “They're trying to make us feel bad about making them feel bad,” Tweten said. This kind of rejection, day after day, can foment a kind of deep resentment among the male daters. After a week, all of the women had received at least one message, the most attractive women had received hundreds, but several of the men remained un-contacted. One blogger recently ran an OkCupid experiment for which he set up five fake male and five fake female profiles. In the words of Elizabeth Bennet, "You are too hasty, sir."īombarded by all these "admirers," many women feel overwhelmed and leave scores of messages unreturned. Or, for more run-of-the-mill indignities, check out Dudes of Tinder, a Tumblr collecting a combination of outlandish profile photos and gross messages (“Wanna meet up for some chicken? Maybe some sex?”). There’s Straight White Boys Texting, which is exactly what it sounds like: (“You should come eat this dick for desert.” ) Minority women seem to have it especially rough there are a number of sites devoted to exposing the uniquely disgusting bile that seems to spew forth when certain white men attempt to woo Asian women. Tweten is part of an growing contingent of women who are dedicated to exposing the shady, hostile, and crass entreaties they get from their digital suitors. “What in society makes them think that it's okay to message someone like that?” she said. ![]() Still, the crude, unsolicited messages are a kind of a bitter aftertaste to what is usually a fun, if sometimes fatiguing, process. She’s had mostly good experiences with online dating, and she met her last serious boyfriend on OkCupid. She acknowledges that these types of messages come from a relatively small number of users. Tweten, who is 27 and works for an entertainment company in Los Angeles, has been on and off OkCupid since 2010. Since creating it Monday of last week, Tweten has received more than two dozen submissions. The name is a play on “Bye Felicia,” a meme used to signify that someone has left a party, and they won’t be missed. That Instagram account became Bye Felipe, Tweten’s crowdsourced menagerie of mankind’s worst specimens. Other women on the Facebook thread agreed, saying they had similar experiences and wanted to see the perpetrators punished in some way, like through a public Instagram account. I hate that men think they can talk to women like that. “If we don't respond, they come back and say, ‘you're a whore.’ If we do respond, we get yelled at and called names. His response: “WHY THE FUCK NOT? If you weren’t interested, you shouldn’t have fucking replied at all! WTF!” ![]()
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